It was still dark outside, nothing, except of a lone car passing by and a few raindrops hitting the window panes, could be heard. Though it was his day off, Christian slowly woke up this early in the morning – like he always did on this date. Every. Single. Year. It was April 4th again and he just couldn’t change anything about it. The date was just marked in his genes, something he would never lose, something that made him always wake up as if an alarm-clock was set. It had become something like a ritual over the past ten years, no matter if he had been with Olli… or not.
Running his fingers through his bedhead hair, he heaved a sigh thinking of Olli, the man who changed everything for him. A bit more than ten years ago Christian thought he was only into women, but then Olli came into his life and turned it upside down. For quite some time Christian denied the effect Olli had on him, fought against all the emotions welling up inside of him until that one day when all fighthing was to no avail. He was exhausted of holding back, of lying to himself, of pushing away Olli, so he let him in.
His thoughts traveled back to the moment ten years ago, when he finally managed to turn the key and unlock the door for Olli, who had been waiting persistently in front of it for a felt eternity. Despite all of the times Christian had pushed him away, he had stayed patient and not given up. It already cost Christian a strenuous effort to finally unlock the door hesitantly, but he just couldn’t bring himself to push the handle and face Olli yet. Christian stepped back and waited with bated breath for Olli’s next move. Nervously he rubbed the palms of his hands against each other and looked up as if sending a quick prayer in hopes of having done the right thing.
Olli opened the door, studied the obviously churned up Christian and just waited. Christian knew it was his turn to say something, but he was still so afraid of… himself. He tried facing Olli, but the moment their eyes met, he lost the tiny bit of courage he had at all, avoided eye contact again and took one deep breath before moistening his lips with his tongue. As if not believing himself what he was about to say, he shook his head slightly before admitting:
“I tried fighting it, but…”
Christian breathed harder, trembling, everything inside of him was stretched to breaking point. He forced himself to look at Olli again who waited expectantly what he had to say. There was this warmth in Olli’s emerald green eyes that soothed him a bit and which allowed him to speak out at last.
“… I’ve fallen in love with you.”
The moment the words were spoken, a strange silence set in. Olli had heard the words but it took him a while to comprehend the whole meaning. Was Christian finally opening up to him and his own emotions? As much as Olli’s heart jumped for joy, he was pretty aware of the fragile bond between them which wasn’t to be destroyed by a rash reaction. Christian was so vulnerable right now and the last thing Olli wanted to do was to scare him off.
Carefully he took one step after the other and slowly approached Christian who had turned his back on him once again. Christian’s chest heaved visibly as if his insecurity tried to break out, but the moment he felt Olli’s hand touching his shoulder lovingly, all of his inhibitions vanished into thin air. He couldn’t explain it, he had never experienced anything like that before, but Olli’s hand put him at ease, made his inner strains vaporize, it just felt… right. He was exactly at the place he was supposed to be - with the person he was supposed to be. So he just let go, he jumped off the edge of the cliff and soared into Olli’s welcoming arms.
They turned to face each other, Olli watching Christian’s every move attentively to make sure he was the one to set the pace. Though Christian seemed to lean in for a kiss, Olli stopped him for the time being by cupping his face with his warm, soft hands, assuring him everything was okay, he was safe. Christian’s closed eyes spoke of trust, of just anticipating the moment their lips would meet again.
But this time it was different. They hadn’t fought before, they weren’t facing each other in a rage, their lips weren’t meeting in a passionate heat that just came over them, instead they leaned in like in slow-motion, kissing carefully and briefly. Chills ran down Olli’s spine, it was so unreal that his love finally admitted his own feelings to himself, it was almost like a dream – or actually it was a dream coming true.
When their lips met, Christian felt like home, a home he had never known or could have imagined before, and he was more than willing to accept and enjoy it. He was ready to give himself completely, body and soul, to this amazing person who had managed to turn his life upside down, so they started a sensual dance, feeling their breaths on their faces when turning around and before leaning in for more kisses.
Olli’s hands were still on Christian’s face and neck, his fingers stroked gently through his hairline, leaving little goosebumps on Christian’s sensitive skin. More goosebumps appeared all over his body and his little hairs weren’t the only ones starting to stand up. Feeling Olli’s lips and finally his tongue on his own made him want more. His hand slid down the frontside of Olli’s shirt, unbuttoning it on his way down slowly, but determined.
Olli watched Christian’s fingers which were surprisingly certain when they freed the buttons, but nevertheless Olli felt the need to look Christian in the eyes to check if he was really sure about it. Christian knew exactly what he was doing and instead of answering the silent question with words, he just kept on unbuttoning Olli’s green shirt. He hadn’t doubted that Olli would be careful with him, but that questioning look, which asked for permission before moving on, just confirmed what he already knew.
Only then Olli also started to unbutton Christian’s shirt as slow as him. If only he knew how damn tight his pants had become but he savored every teasingly long second to the fullest. Both of them breathed heavier, their breath tickling on the other’s faces when Christian slid Olli’s shirt over his shoulders. Olli took over and removed his shirt himself while Christian’s hand traveled to the warm skin just over his waistband, but he couldn’t linger there for long, otherwise he couldn’t have guaranteed for anything.
He told himself they had all the time in the world, to not hurry anything. So instead of ripping off Olli’s belt right away, he rather slipped out of his own shirt instead, supported by Olli’s hands that helped him to get out of the sleeves. As soon as the disturbing fabric between them was gone, their trembling hands finally made skin contact again. It had already been too long that they had touched and so the palms on each other’s necks sent pleasant chills down their spines.
Christian needed to feel Olli’s warm full lips again, which felt so damn good on his. Luckily Olli seemed to have the same on his mind and so they first merged slowly but the kisses got more intense with every thumping heartbeat. Christian pulled Olli closer, signalling him he needed more, needed to pick up the pace. His hungry lips moved away from Olli’s mouth and gave his shoulder a teasing little bite whereas Olli caressed his neck. Why the hell did he already know that one spot there? If Christian hadn’t been a loaded weapon anyway, he would have been one by then.
A deep moan escaped Christian’s lips before he buried his face in the crook of Olli’s neck again. He took in the unique scent of Olli’s warm skin, which was rooted in his brain since he had leaned so closely over him and almost kissed him while he was sleeping on the couch a few weeks ago. Christian wrapped his hand around his shoulder, which gave a bit of support for his wobbly knees, especially when he felt Olli’s hand gliding through his hair while still nibbling on his neck before their lips found back to each other.
Their tongues eagerly explored their counterpart and Christian couldn’t think of anything that had ever tasted better. Not that he was thinking a lot in this situation anyway… He needed to taste more of Olli and therefore he tried to direct him backwards to his bed, but when Olli noticed where they were heading to, he broke the kiss and shook his head with a sly grin around his pink lips, which were shiny from making out. His reaction totally confused Christian. Did he do anything wrong? Did he break any rule he didn’t know anything of? Insecurely he stammered:
“Wha… what’s wrong?”
“It’s just the wrong direction. For now…”
When Olli gently pushed him into the opposite direction with their eyes locked, he still didn’t know what this was all about, but he trusted him and let it happen. After a few steps backwards Olli let go of Christian’s body with his right hand and grabbed somewhere behind him. A wisp of wind blew over his naked torso before a bang could be heard. Christian’s head fell back in realization that the door still had been open.
Gliding his tongue over Christian’s exposed Adam’s apple, he whispered:
“Now, I’m all yours. Do whatever you want.”
Whatever you want, whatever you want… When he was totally honest to himself, he still had no idea where this was all leading to, but he knew exactly what he didn’t want. He had to get rid of that damn fabric between them. Christian started to kiss Olli hungrily again and grabbed his belt to open it while leading him to his bed with the striped bed linens. But his slightly trembling fingers didn’t make it easy to pull the leather out of the buckle. Finally it gave way, right before Olli’s lower legs touched the bed.
Christian had to realize that kissing, walking and getting rid of pants all at the same time didn’t really work, so he stopped and just concentrated on opening Olli’s pants. When his fingers fumbled on the button and zipper, he could feel Olli’s boner through the stretched fabric. First it was just a slight touch by accident, but then he couldn’t hold back and let his hand glide between Olli’s jeans and boxers. He could hear Olli inhale sharply when his hand cupped his cock and glided up and down a few times. Christian looked up in Olli’s closed eyes and bit on his own lower lip because it was so damn sexy to see the effect he had on him.
His own cock was so hard that it threatened to tear either the fabric or himself apart, so the faster he could get them out of their clothes, the better. With steadier hands now, he pulled Olli’s pants down, helped him to step out of them and then pushed him gently onto the bed. Olli leant back on his arms and watched Christian pulling down his own pants eagerly. Unfortunately he was a bit too eager and became entangled in his pant legs which made him lose his balance and made him fall onto Olli inelegantly.
Olli moaned in laughter when Christian crashed down on him and tried to get rid of his pant legs, which were still entangled around his feet, by thrashing about. When their eyes met, both started to laugh wholeheartedly. With a grin Olli said:
“We certainly need to work on your ‘presentation’.”
After a few more giggles, both got serious again.
“But at least I’m here…”
Olli could only hope that Christian had the slightest idea how much it meant for him having him right there. Skillfully he turned them both around and moved them more to the middle of the bed. With Olli hovering over him, Christian noticed that his eyes had turned to a darker green than they usually were and almost got lost in them when he came closer to caress him again. They continued kissing passionately and nibbled playfully on each other’s lips until they breathed heavily.
Slowly Olli let go of Christian’s mouth and moved further down his body. His tongue followed an invisible trail down Christian’s neck, over his collarbones to one of his nipples. Christian had closed his eyes and was kind of surprised to feel the contrast between Olli’s soft lips and tongue on one side and his slight stubbles otherwise. Though Olli was clean-shaven, it felt different to the soft skin he was used to from the girls he was with before. Now it felt way better and turned him on even more.
Without Christian noticing it, Olli had shifted his weight to get a hand free. He still circled the nipple with his tongue, but suddenly he gave it a gentle bite while grabbing and stroking Christian’s hard cock through his boxers at the same time. The world started to spin for Christian and if he hadn’t lain anyway, he would have lost any balance. He was surprised to hear a throaty moan and didn’t even realize it was him.
Looking up, Olli had to smile when he saw the bliss on Christian’s face. Encouraged, he let go of Christian’s boner and moved further down to be able to remove his boxers. Watching Christian’s reaction carefully, he grabbed their waistband and pulled them down when he saw Christian was looking at him, nodding slightly and lifting up his hips.
This was exactly the reason why Christian felt so safe with Olli. No matter what he did, it resonated with care, Christian knew that Olli wouldn’t do anything he wasn’t ready for yet. To show him that he didn’t need to hesitate, Christian opened his legs a bit more and bended them to give Olli space to crawl up between them again.
Olli understood very well and pulled down his own boxers while Christian was watching him. His look wandered over Olli’s toned body but got stuck on his boner. A while ago he had never thought that another guy’s cock could be sexy, but damn it, he couldn’t wait to feel this one again. Luckily Olli didn’t let him wait any longer and lay down on top of him.
Christian had that sexy dirt in his voice and emphasized his request by pulling Olli closer with his hand being buried in his dark hair at the back of his head. While their tongues danced a wild tango, Olli rubbed his boner up and down Christian’s cock. Christian trembled a bit, grabbed Olli’s neck and intensified the kiss, but Olli broke it and the contact of their hard-ons after a while to Christian’s dislike. He didn’t want to let him go and let him know with a disappointed growl, but Olli hushed him by putting his pointer on Christian’s wet swollen lips.
Without any detours, he went down under Christian’s watchful eyes. Olli began stroking him first, circled the glans, which was moist from precum, with his thumb and never stopped looking at him as well. Christian was torn between just letting his head fall back, closing his eyes and just enjoy Olli’s caresses or watching his cock glide through Olli’s fist. Forward, backwards, forward, … More precum leaked at the tip of his head and started dripping down at the side. Olli leant forward, still looking at Christian, licked along the shaft and circled the tip with his tongue teasingly. The moment Olli’s tongue licked over his cock, Christian closed his eyes but when he noticed Olli had stopped and he could just feel his breath on his boner, he looked down again to realize that Olli obviously had just waited for him to watch closely.
As soon as Olli was sure that all eyes were on him and his mouth, he grinned knowingly and engulfed Christian’s cock with his lips. Seeing his boner disappearing between Olli’s lips was just too much for Christian. He couldn’t watch anymore and threw back his head. The knuckles of his fingers turned white when he grabbed for the bed linens and almost tore them apart. Olli definitely knew what he was doing, and better than anyone Christian had been with before. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead and he could hardly contain himself to ram his hips upwards. Olli sucked like a champion and somehow between all his moans, groans and heavy breathing, Christian managed to mumble.
Olli was too occupied to understand his quiet request. Still sucking he could only reply.
“Stop… Stop. Stop!”
Olli let go immediately with his forehead frowned in worry. Did he interpret anything wrong? Christian was enjoying it, wasn’t he? Or did he suddenly change his mind? Christian still tried to catch his breath, his chest heaving extremely with every breath he took.
“Are you okay? I’m sorry, I didn’t want to…”
Finally Christian could support himself on his arms again, smiled shyly and interrupted the apology.
“Nononono! Don’t worry! Everything’s fine. More than fine. I… I just don’t want to come. Not yet.”
Relieved Olli sank down next to Christian and kissed him lovingly before Christian turned him around and straddled him.
Christian looked down at Olli lying under him and studied his features. The clear-cut face, his neck where his pulse beat visibly, his strong shoulders, his toned pecs and abs. His hands caressed them all, teasing Olli’s hardening nipples with circling motions on the way down before following the lines of his abs and the V to his crotch. Olli’s skin was soft and warm whereas his muscles underneath were hard when he flexed them – and he did automatically wherever Christian’s hands traveled.
For the second time in his life he took a boner in his hand that wasn’t his and began stroking it. Why had he been waiting for so long? This was where he belonged, this was what made him happy… and aroused him. At first he was still a bit insecure what Olli might like but when he just copied the kind of touches and strokes he liked himself, they evoked the desired reactions. He got even harder seeing Olli’s chest heaving more and more, the precum glistening on Olli and his own hand but it was his moans that sent chills down Christian’s spine.
Since he obviously did a lot right, he got more courageous and moved a bit so he could lower his head to get close to Olli’s crotch. He felt Olli’s finger running through his hair begging him to continue. Christian’s heart beat uptempo, taking a cock into his mouth was still unfamiliar for him, but nevertheless he couldn’t wait to taste Olli.
Christian moistened his lips with his tongue before opening them and letting them glide over Olli’s glans. For a moment Olli clung to his hair, but he let go again and grabbed for the sheets instead when Christian started to suck him. First he started off slowly, but when he realized how much it turned him on, his head went up and down more eagerly, his tongue exploring every accessible part of skin.
Though it was new, it felt so natural for Christian. Feeling the throbbing shaft on his tongue and tasting the still dripping precum. But then it happened. One more stroke and he took it in too deep. Christian gagged clearly audible and let go of Olli’s cock immediately. The gagging sound didn’t go unnoticed for Olli.
“Hey, hey, slow…”
Christian felt so embarrassed that he didn’t know yet where his limits were, he couldn’t help it, but his face turned as red as a beetroot. If only the ground would open and swallow him up. Olli noticed Christian’s insecurity and tried to calm him down.
“Hey, that’s nothing to worry about. I’d be worried if you could already swallow me completely. Come here.”
The sheepish grin relaxed Christian a bit, so he crawled into Olli’s open arms where they kissed tenderly again. Olli started moving his hips, trying to create more friction with Christian’s boner and moaned when Christian responded with humping motions and more passionate kisses. How did Olli manage to take away all of his inhibitions within a blink of an eye? Christian loved to feel Olli this close, his hands stroking his back, but all of this wasn’t close enough. He needed to feel more of him. Hesitantly he broke their kiss and waited till Olli looked him squarely into his eyes.
“Olli… um… It feels so good being with you and… ”
Damn it! Why couldn’t he just say what he wanted? But whatever words came into his mind, they all sounded like expressions in cheap porn and that was the last thing he wanted. Though Olli looked at him expectantly and waited patiently for him to complete his request, Christian could still just hint at it.
“Um… May I…?”
Olli realized that Christian wouldn’t get the words over his lips for now, but he understood very well what his point was.
“I’d love to feel you inside of me.”
Still not knowing what to say, he just gave Olli a long kiss before crawling up to his nightstand. He opened a drawer, fetched a condom from it and presented it to Olli.
“Have you ever done it before?”
“Well… not there…”
“Okay, don’t worry. I’ll guide you. Do you have lube or anything like that?”
“By accident there was this sample in the box of condoms.”
Christian also fumbled it out of the drawer and came back to Olli with both in his hand. He looked at Olli who had raised an eyebrow.
“Okay, okay… You need to prepare me.”
Olli grabbed a pillow, put it under his butt and spread his legs.
“Take the lube, put some on your finger, massage me a bit and insert it carefully.”
Nervously Christian brought himself into position between Olli’s legs and was almost ashamed to look at him. With the way Olli was spread in front of him, not one tiny square inch of Olli’s body was left to his imagination anymore. But when he allowed himself to take a closer look, it made his blood boil. Was it Olli’s throbbing cock, his hairless balls, his entrance waiting for him or rather the fact that Olli trusted him enough to lie there like this?
Under Olli’s observation, he opened the lube with trembling fingers and pressed some onto his pointer before guiding it to its destination. Christian noticed that Olli twitched a bit when he touched him with the cold lube for the first time. Slowly he circled Olli’s entrance and increased the pressure carefully. It didn’t take long and the tip of his finger slipped in. Christian paused, checked in on Olli who seemed to be perfectly fine.
“It’s good. Go on. Just take a bit more lube.”
Assured by Olli’s prompt, he withdrew his finger and took more lube. When he inserted his finger for the second time, it glided easier and further in than before, though the silky walls were still pretty tight. He started to move his finger back and forth while Olli grabbed his own cock and stroked it in the same rhythm.
“You can add another finger. And bend them inside.”
Christian added once again more lube and gently pushed his second finger in. Olli’s sphincter didn’t show much resistance and when he indeed bent his fingers, Olli lifted his hips with a guttural moan which surprised Christian. He looked up and saw the bliss on Olli’s face.
“Woah! What was that?”
“The magic spot…”
Christian continued to rub that magic spot with one hand and jerked himself with the other. He was hard as a rock and couldn’t wait to be inside of Olli and be surrounded by his body. Still moaning, Olli just took the condom from the mattress and held it out.
“Are you ready?”
Olli just nodded and watched how he removed the condom from the package with trembling fingers. Christian needed to take a deep breath to calm himself down a bit. He was so nervous like a teenager before his first time when he applied once more lube on the condom. Well, basically it was his first time, since he had never been with a guy like that before. Not even with Olli. Their first time just a couple of weeks ago was all about hands, mouths and tongues, but they didn’t go the whole hog then. In hindsight he was glad that they didn’t do it the first time. Now he knew that he wanted to be here with Olli for sure, he could finally admit wholeheartedly that this was his place. And he was damn sure that he wouldn’t regret it again afterwards.
“Don’t you want to turn around, Olli?”
Olli smiled and shook his head. Immediately Christian felt a bit foolish or rather inexperienced. He had never really thought about the possible positions for two men but somehow doggy style was the first which came to his mind. Instead he brought himself now into position on his knees, lining up the tip of his cock with Olli’s entrance.
“Just take it slow, okay?”
He needed to take a few breaths before he started to apply some pressure there. Alternating he looked up to check in on Olli, if he was still okay, and down to his own cock to stay in control. Slowly the sphincter gave way and he could insert the tip of his cock. When Olli had given him head before, he had already almost lost it watching his cock disappearing into his mouth. But watching and feeling how his cock was slowly swallowed by his tight entrance demanded every bit of restraint he could find. He stopped his movement forward, gasped for air and closed his eyes, trying to imagine something disgusting to hold himself back. He certainly didn’t want it to end before it had begun.